I have to go on blind dates on an almost weekly basis “to find a suitable boy” to “marry” so that I can be “happy” because clearly to those around me “I’m not happy”.
So I walk in to meet blind date dude 799 (or atleast that is how it feels) at McDonalds, the chosen venue, fuming because at the entrance I had to make minor adjustments so that my appearance would be just fine..it was only after sitting down did my mother realize that I was still wearing my glasses, she hisses “remove your specs!” which I chose to ignore and fortunately she could not do anything more radical because the damage was already done.
So I look around for dude 799 only to find out that he is going to be fashionably late, it is walking distance from where he works so apparently there is some logic in him turning up after I get to the venue. Thirty mins after I get there he walks in, plonks himself in front of me and looks to me as if I am supposed to do all the talking. The hell. I looked at the joker blankly to which he goes “You wanted to see me?”. (This is the second incident I was kept waiting, first was at the first meeting which was set up for us to meet, but only the mother and sister turned up because they had to appraise me first and if they find me al-right, their little brat will anyway agree. WHAT A MORON.) I reply yeah it is part of the procedure, although in my head I wanted to ask ‘do I look like I want to be here?’. He continues to stare at my face almost as if he wasnt sure what procedure meant. Then he goes “are you shy?”, I say no this is routine. Then he goes “what is your ambition?”, what does one say when one asks, a doctor, lawyer, architect etc “what is your ambition?”. I dont remember the entirety of the conversation, but at one point when I mentioned that I havent done my Masters yet, he replied “oh you want to be a master”. Sigh. After a painstaking half-hour or so of this it was time to wrap up, at which he goes “You like me?”. Me in all my meanness did not have the balls to say no I dont instead I just sai “er, we just met”. Then his mother comes, hugs me and goes “you like him?”. Seriously people, ever heard of body language?
Once dude 799 and his clan leaves, my clan along with my brother’s friend sits down to discuss the event and starts listing down further candidates from their circle as possible potentials!